Living Fully Into the Death of Christ

I must admit that as my turn to write something for the SalvationLife blog approached there was a bit of nervousness and uncertainty about what to say. Most who will read this blog will have no idea who John Grant is, or why they should even read what he may have to say. I am excited about Daniel’s vision for SalvationLife, and am equally excited and honored in being asked to be a part of it. But still the question lingers: who is John Grant, and why listen? 

It seems to me that is one of the questions that lingered in those days between the resurrection and Pentecost. Those early disciples must have wondered about their collective identity. Just who were they in light of what had just taken place? Things were different. The nascent church—meeting in secrecy, shrouded with fear, uncertain, unsure—knew things had changed, but what did it mean? I think that is one of the main questions answered on Pentecost: the question of ecclesial identity. Pentecost introduced the church not only to the world, but to itself.

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Life in a Long Holy Saturday

Good Friday this year would have been my dad's 70th birthday. I had noticed that ahead of time on the calendar, and was aware of it, but I didn’t really think it would be a big deal to me. While he was alive, my father made the least fuss about birthdays of anyone I’ve ever known, so making a big deal about his birthday in the few years since his death has always seemed a bit unfitting. 

One of the things I’ve learned about losing someone you love is that you never can predict what the things will be that will pop up and make you suddenly miss them intensely (like I wrote about a while back as I almost lost it over a Spam sandwich). On the morning of Good Friday, I woke up fine, expecting to give a good deal of my thoughts to the day’s stories about Jesus, but it didn’t take long for one of those kinds of surprises to catch me and leave me also spending a lot of the remainder of the day thinking about my dad. 

It happened when I first saw my two-year-old daughter that morning. Dad never got to meet her, but one week before he died, we were able to tell him that my wife was pregnant. He would have loved this little girl like crazy, and she would have soaked his love in and then returned every bit of it in a way that only she can do.

She’s in a stage now where anything that we call a “special day” is a major event to be exhilarated about, and then if we use the word, “party,” she’s likely to blow an adrenaline circuit. She’s always looking for any excuse to put on her tutu and eat cake or candy, and the special days and parties are obvious opportunities to do such things. So, when I saw her that morning, what we would have been doing if her granddad had still been here instantly flashed before my mind. She would have worn her favorite pink tutu, opened the door at his house, run to him with pigtails bouncing and given him a happy birthday hug and kiss, giving a big grin to my dad and all of us with her incomparable laugh.

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Going All In

An odd thing about Jesus is that, every time he seems to be faced with temptation to give up on the Father’s plan that has him dying for the world’s sins, Jesus then overcomes the temptation with extra resolve. We’ve seen this throughout Lent. Right at the beginning of his ministry, he goes into the wilderness for the sole purpose of subjecting himself to temptation by no less than Satan himself. He comes out toughened and confirmed and ready for work.  

Later, when Jesus begins to share with his disciples that he is going to have to die, Peter tempts Jesus by telling him that this isn’t the Father’s will. This really gets to Jesus, and Jesus responds by rebuking Peter (and Satan, who seems to be behind it all). Then, for good measure, Jesus says, “In fact, not only do I have to die, but anyone who wants to walk with me has to take up their cross and get in line!” Resolve!

Just a few days before the end, Jesus is standing among all the worshipers at the Temple, and he seems to be struggling. He tells everyone that his hour has come, and then he prays, “I don’t know what to say. Father, save me from this hour.” And then, the resolve, “No! It is for this reason I have come to this hour. Father, glorify your name.” Every time the chips are down, Jesus goes all in.

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Can the Rocks Really Cry Out?

I just started co-teaching a class on the spiritual disciplines using Richard Foster’s book Celebration of Discipline: The Path to Spiritual Growth as our guide.  In writing about the discipline of meditation Foster suggests that “Christian meditation, very simply, is the ability to hear God’s voice and obey his word.”  Of course this hearing God’s voice and obeying his word applies to all of the disciplines, and also suggests a very healthy way in which we are to follow Christ and live our lives for Him.

Living in a constant state of meditation on the life of Christ is hard to do, but is a reasonable and obtainable life I believe those who follow Christ are called to practice and live out.  I am not an expert, and my experiences of listening to the still small voice of God and being obedient need to be improved upon, but I am challenged to live my life in this manner while learning as I grow.

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Two Fish and Lent

This is my first time writing on Daniel’s blog… which is actually rather intimidating! I was honored that Daniel wanted to include me as one of the contributors, but this group of men are on an advanced, doctoral level.  I’m more on the preschool level.  As the sole female, I hate to do that disservice to other women.  I would prefer for our sole representative to be able to show up these men academically and theologically (in the nicest Christian-ly way of course) but for any of you women reading this, don’t get your hopes up with me.  However, I am glad and thankful to be able to occasionally share my thoughts on here and I hope at least someone will be able to identify with them.

Daniel and I have a five year old son and a two year old daughter.  The other day I was watching an animated movie with them called The Jesus Movie.  Our son enthusiastically picked it out from the church library.  I cringed inwardly at his selection – doesn’t a cartoon movie with such a “creative” title, just scream Christian cheesiness?!  Thankfully, it was actually much better and more entertaining than I was expecting for a cartoon version of Jesus’ life.  

As I was watching (I’ll admit–not very attentively), it came to the story of the feeding of the 5,000.  I've heard that story countless times, and typically my focus is on the miracle of Jesus turning a small amount of food into enough to satisfy the hunger of a huge crowd with many baskets leftover.  Wow!  That should certainly capture our attention.  However, this time something different stood out to me.  My focus was on the small cartoon-boy who handed over his lunch. Jesus looked at him with eyes of compassion and said “Thank you for your offering.”

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This Will Be Better with Friends

This week represents a significant change for me, for this site, and for those of you who pay attention to it. I have been convinced for a while now that I am in profound need of the help of others if I want to fully become the kind of person I want to be, and this has also proven to be true in terms of the projects I've worked on over the past few years through SalvationLife.com and SalvationLife Books. Everything––from a blog post to my life overall––turns out better when I involve other people.

So, as of this week, this blog and these books will also include contributions from others. Here are some of the main folks you'll hear from, each of whom have played an important role in my life:

  • Luke Ankeny: Luke is the pastor of Homedale Friends Community Church in Homedale, ID. Luke has lived spiritual formation in front of/with/and for me (and for many others) since before I had any clue what spiritual formation was.
  • John Grant: John has spent years as a Nazarene pastor and is currently working on a PhD in stuff I have trouble understanding. He has a great mind, and he and I became friends in graduate school because of his great heart. My friendship with John was one of my first real tastes of how good a spiritual friendship can be. (See John's blog.)
  • Kara Harris: No one else both helps me become and makes me want to keep becoming a better person as much as Kara, which is part of why I continue to be very glad that she married me. I and everything I do would be a mess without her, and this blog will be dramatically better with her contribution.
  • Robert Pelfrey: Robert is Associate Pastor at First United Methodist Church of Midland, TX (my church home), and later this summer will become pastor of Western Hills United Methodist Church in El Paso. He may be the smartest person I know, and his friendship has been invaluable to me as we have shared this journey of seeking to become more like Jesus together. I'm thrilled that SalvationLife Books will publish Robert's first book, Rock God, in the summer of 2014. (See Robert's blog.)